Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Free Stuff

Somali people (and all Africans in general) love free stuff as I stated earlier.

Let me begin this post with a true story told to me by my father.
So my father had a friend [lets call him Ahmed] and he loved to eat. When he came to America, he became bewildered with the concept of all-you-can-eat buffets. There was one particular buffet that Ahmed found incredible. So Ahmed would wake up early in the morning, upon the restaurants opening, and line up at the door of the buffet. He would then enter and eat through the breakfast, lunch, and dinner menus. Getting up occasionally to use the bathroom or stretch. He would leap to his feet with every new arrival on the buffet table. Anything that came his way he ate or took for "savings". This continued 3 straight days at the buffet and then finally the manager stepped in. The manager told the Ahmed that he was bad for business and gave him back a full refund of $24 dollars for the past three days. He then asked Ahmed to leave and never come back.

Ahmed is an extreme case of the Somali love affair with free stuff. Somalis love free stuff because Somalis are generally very frugal. But you have to understand that Somalis were in a recession long before Wall Street. Somalis cannot afford to spend shillings in an economy like this! Obama where is the Somali bailout at?

Going shopping with a somali hoyoo [mother] is madness:
"Wait Mr. Cashier I have some cubons!"

"Sorry,Ma'am, but these are expired".

"What you mean expired? I get them from the paper today!

Somali's don't go for the whole no free lunch in america thing. The freer the better. It's just simply how we roll.

SORRY FOR THE LACK OF POSTS! I've been quite busy. Working on some new stuff!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

#1 Weddings

Can you count the number of weddings you've gone to on your hands?

If you are Somali the answer is most likely NO! Somalis LOVE weddings. No, I mean really LOVE weddings. Somalis were the 1st ever wedding crashers, long before the term even existed. [However, it does not matter who the bride/groom are because somalis are all connected, somehow.]

Somali people love weddings for various reasons. The teenagers love it because it is a chance to practice their shukansii in the hotel lobby. For single Somalis in hopes of finding a mate, weddings are where its at! Married somali woman love weddings because they get to leave the kusband and 7+ children for a night of dancing and gossip. Very few somali men go to weddings. Very, very few. The ones that do attend weddings are either the "coming-to-americas" who are in need of wifeys to give them the green card or the "im-so-gangster-with-my-pants-to-the-ground" boys who go to stand against a wall and watch the festivities take place. Both groups of men hope on seeing some fast nikko (which is when they floor-rush on the dance floor) or to obtain some digits for the t-mobile. Of course free food is a universal plus to all demographics in the somali community when attending a wedding. Some somalis love the food so much that they even take some "to-go". [But that's another post for another time. :) ]

Somalis also love anything thats free, hence making weddings quite popular in the somali community. The highlight of all somali weddings for the youth is when "English" music plays. The place turns form Muqdisho to Compton in all about 25 seconds. The old woman quickly retreat to their seats to avoid getting trampled by the "im-so-gangster-with-my-pants-to-the-ground" boys, the younger somali women, and the "coming-to-americas." (*the coming-to-americas really love "gangESTer rap", whether or not they can pronounce the lyrics.) The once diginifed wedding becomes a club and people get crunk, jiggy, and hyphy. The party becomes a BARTY. The older folk watch horrifed in their seats and the DJ finally cuts the cord when Abdikarim nearly has a seizure dancing. The party then comes to a close and somali people happily file out. Another successful somali wedding.


Welcome to! This blog is a spin-off of, check it out it's absolutely hilarious! Anyways, this blog will list and discuss stuff somali people like! We will also discuss trends in the somali community, whether it be "gangester" rap and jeans ka isgu daga (skinny jeans) this blog shall cover all the bases. If you have any ideas or suggestions leave a comment! Please tell your friends about this blog! The more somalis the better right? right?